Sandhya Tan and Viknesh's Wedding (8/6/2025)

As any Malaysians, we are lucky to grow up in a multicultural society and if we grew up in a multicultural family, that would be a bonus!  A bit of my family background, majority of us are Chinese (Malaysian Chinese) and I have an uncle who has a spouse - my aunt - an Indian - that means my cousins have a mixed heritage. 

Growing up, I always wonder why my cousins have both names, I'm used to call by their Chinese names. Then I realised their Indian names act as an English name in front follow by their Chinese names. They might not speak Chinese but at least they come back every year on Chinese New Year. My maternal grandparents have seven grandchildren. I expect that my oldest cousin will get married first but things turned around it was my cousin Kim Hua is the first to get married! 

My cousin-in-law, Viknesh, is Indian, so the wedding is gone according by the Indian culture. To pay tribute to half of my cousins' half Chinese roots, I opted for a purple modern hanfu. Also, we were going to a Hindu temple, it's best to wear modestly (same applies to any worship places in Malaysia). At 10.30am, we went into the marriage registry office.

My cousin Kim Hua (right) and I matched in purple.

The officiate spoke in Tamil and English, when she finally announced that Kim Hua and Viknesh are legally married, I led the cheering. After the registry, we proceeded to the main hall of the temple for a simple blessing ceremony. When I was about to go in, the temple keeper said: "Miss, please take off your shoes before entering," In any Asian households, shoes are left outside upon entering the house, it's the same thing when we visit any temples. 

I have to say the herbal water was tasty! This is my first time at a Hindu temple, I'm quite fascinated by the colours. The Hindu priest performed the blessing ritual and there's a part which the oil lamp was passed around as a blessing. My uncle was explaining the ritual when they put the flower garland around the couple's necks, and the fun part was throwing flowers to the couple. The ceremony ended by walking around the temple hall and bowing to the elderly as a sign of respect. 

I had some difficulties walking out of the temple because my feet stepped on the rice that was left during the blessing ceremony and it's off to the lucheon reception at Ganjaa 8 Royal Indian Cuisine. It's an all-vegetarian buffet and free seating too. We took a family photo on the stage and stayed back to witness the cake cutting. After that, it's time to head home (Melaka), otherwise, Lexi (the family dog) will be wondering where we were for the past two days. 

I don't know who the next cousin is to get hitched, and I wish them all the best in this new journey and every happiness in years to come! 

Tjinn Lyim and Wei Ling’s Wedding (28/9/19)

I have been to countless of weddings, mostly are from my maternal grandmother’s extended family. The last time I was really involved in a wedding when I was five years old when my bei ku (my mummy’s youngest brother) got married. I remembered I was under watchful eyes of my uncles and aunts, as my mummy had to care and attend my (younger) sister.

My only role at the wedding back then was to serve the tea to the bride and groom- my uncle and aunt, of course! I was carried by my sa ku (mummy’s third elder brother; third uncle in Hokkien) when I served the tea. I remembered I gave them each a peck on the cheeks, they are my immediately family members.

17 years later, I’m reprising my role again! This time is on my dad’s side of the family. My cousin Tjinn Lyim is stepping into next phase in life- marriage. A little bit of my cousin, he is the oldest among the six of the cousins, and I would say he is the best cousin in the world!

One thing I share with Tjinn Lyim gor gor is the love of photography. In fact most of the cousins love photography, and I think that is one of the interests that made us click together. One of the memorable gifts that Tjinn Lyim gor gor gave me was a photo of my star sign- Scorpio. I had no idea how did he manage to capture the constellation? Yeah it’s the best gift that he had given me and I’m still keeping it and even reposted on Instagram.

I’ll take you to the wedding scene. Yesterday I got to know that the colour theme for the morning session is yellow. Although red in the Chinese culture is an auspicious colour, it's still up to the couple to choose which colour for the bridal entourage (heng dai 兄弟 and jie mei 姐妹). I don't want to upstage the newlyweds but I want to stand out in the crowd so I wear a bright yellow cheongsam with seqiun shoes from Pazzion. It's off to the ceremony!

As I arrive at the house, my bak leong (大伯母) asked me why I didn't join my cousins to fetch the bride. I overslept, which is true cause I couldn't get up that early. While waiting for the couple to arrive, I have some food to fill up my tummy since I have a simple breakfast at home.

At 11.48am, the bride and the groom have arrived. Tjinn Lyim gor gor (表哥) is bringing home Wei Ling jie jie (表嫂) as his wife. As according to Malaysian Chinese wedding tradition, we have to hide in the corner when the bride comes in until it is time for us to come up and greet the couple. I'm not sure what is the meaning behind this but anyway, I get to see the couple serving tea to my gu gu (姑姑) and gu cheong (姑丈).

While Wei Ling jie jie (表嫂) is with  her jie mei (姐妹), I walk up to my Tjinn Lyim gor gor (表哥) and give him a big hug and the four of the cousins which comprise  of Tjinn Lyim gor gor (表哥), How Yan gor gor (大堂哥), Yhi Ling (堂姐) and me. Unfortunately How Yi gor gor (二堂哥) is not here, so does my sister as she is in Great Britian furthering her studies. If not the six of us would be together after a long time! 

Not long after, the couple change into a more traditional wedding attire. There is a long history of the red wedding gown that Wei Ling jie jie is wearing because it was worn by all the ladies in the Chin family (my mummy and bak leong) and it was belonged to my gu gu when she got married. Wei Ling jie jie is the second generation to wear this traditional wedding gown.

While waiting for the younger generation to serve the tea, How Yan gor gor, Yhi Ling and I have bites of siew yuk. Until the cultural hype person calls all the younger cousins of the groom. How Yan gor gor goes on first as he is the oldest, followed by Yhi Ling and me. When it is my turn to wish the couple, I take a deep breath and Tjinn Lyim gor gor said: "Marn, you seemed got everything prepared!" The next thing we know is wishing the couple for a long-lasting and happy marriage.

For the wedding night, I change into another cheongsam but this time is in pink and it's longer as compared to the yellow one which I wore this morning. I didn't use the photobooth during the cocktail party (tip: if there is a photobooth at any events, please use them). I did manage to take a picture with the bride and groom. Tjinn Lyim compliments that I look pretty in pink and definitely like a princess for the night.

We head into the ballroom and the best part is we are seated near the main table, and of course the stage! As everyone settles down in their seats, the emcees announce the arrival the parents of both the bride and the groom, and finally the main characters of the night- Tjinn Lyim gor gor and Wei Ling jie jie!

In every Malaysian Chinese wedding dinner, there is a champagne popping follow by the three toasts (yum seng). Tjinn Lyim gor gor even sings a song or two as a surprise for Wei Ling jie jie, so romantic! We also have a best man and maid of honour speeches. After that, a video montage is shown on the screen of the gate crashing, which the groom had to cross some "obstacles" in order to get the bride and How Yan gor gor is in it too, since he is part of the heng dai. The night ends with picture taking from both sides of the family.

I just love weddings! I'm so happy and honoured to be apart of the journey! I wish Tjinn Lyim gor gor and Wei Ling jie jie for an ever lasting love and marriage!

 Tjinn Lyim with his favourite cousin 

All the cousins in the Chin clan, missing two of them 

Tjinn Lyim looks super handsome in his suit 

I'm with the bride with herself- Wei Ling 

Showing off my princess pose 

Wishing the newlyweds

Ben and Ethel's Wedding (17/10/15)

  I attended my cousin's wedding. It was indeed a magical one! This morning, my parents and I came from KL all the way to my hometown, Malacca to attend the red letter occasion. This is my first wedding dinner in two years, the last one was Amanda's, she is too my cousin. I guess you must be why I have so many cousins. My maternal grandmother came from a big family. We have a long chain of connection  When it comes to special occasions like weddings, Chinese New Year, the fun will never stop!

  Speaking of dresses, I can't decide which one to put on. Even though it was hours before the wedding, I have to make my mind up somehow. Luckily, my mum brought a few dresses to try on. One was a sleeveless red dress which was not my sense of style, "There's a mini jacket you can put on," mum said. After putting on the red knee-length dress, the mini jacket is a perfect match. As they always say "mums know everything". 

   At 6.30 pm, we left for the wedding. I was in high spirits because I like big occasions which are lively. As we reached Ramada Hotel, dad dropped us first then he went to find a parking spot. At the entrance of the lobby, we bumped into my cousins, aunts, nephew and nieces. We went in together as a family. We took the lift to the seventh floor- that's where the wedding was held at the Grand Ballroom. Oh and I did mention that my school's senior prom was held at this very place as well? 

The room was packed with guests as they mingled around greeting each other. I held on to my grandma's hand as we mingled because there are a lot of people. I was almost knocked down by one of the guests (I mean, how rude they were?). 

  At 7.30pm, all the guests went in to take their places. The emcees introduced themselves as Dennis and Mary. When I heard Dennis' name,  I was star struck because he appeared a few times on JinnyBoy TV. He is one of Malaysia's famous top YouTuber! I can't believe he was the host of the night. 

  As the moment we were waiting for, the bride who is Ethel strolled down the aisle with her proud dad. This was the heartwarming scence ever! The couple went to the stage to cut the cake. Ethel gave her lucky bouquet of roses to her big sister. 

  Ethel hopes her sister will find her "Mr. Right". The dinner presentation was led by two singers, one by one waiters served dinner to our table. The Malaysian band entertained us with love songs. A magic performance by Zelvin- Malaysia's youngest magician. 

  My favourite trick was two cards were combined as one. How did he do that? I was so amazed! Ethel was even more amazed because she loves magic tricks since young. Every wedding dinner will have a toasting session. In the Malaysian way, we called it as "yum seng" which means "cheers". They showed the footage of the morning reception. There was a lion dance to welcome the couple

  As everyone was leaving, I saw Dennis, the YouTuber, who was leaving with Mary. As a big fan, I quickly went over to take a photo with him. "I'm a big fan of yours. My younger sister and I always watch the videos on Youtube with JinnyBoy," 

"Oh wow! I didn't know I have fans tonight! Which college you're in?" Dennis asked. "I'm in Sunway College," I said. He wished all the best in my studies. I was so star struck! 

  During the after-dinner party, everyone took photos because all the Tan family member are here. Not forgetting to take a photo with the stars of the day-Ben and Ethel. I had a time of my life and welcome to the family Ethel!